She speaks....
Confessed by Lola at 8:17 PM
Sorry folks for not speaking up until now. I tend to stay pretty busy, and setting time aside to make a post tends to take a back seat from time to time. Especially where kids are concerned.
I want to give a brief post about our enjoyable evening with Josh and Julianne, but it won't be as in depth or detailed as I would prefer. So have patience, and know that more will follow.
Josh and Julianne were everything we expected them to be and more. We knew we would enjoy their company, and knew, somewhat, from pictures we had seen that they were both gorgeous. And they were! Julianne had that long gorgeous red hair that I covet, and Josh was too cute, handsome, and adorable for words.
The only part of the evening that I want to delve into at this point is the awkwardness that seeps into an evening with a playful couple when both couples can be a bit shy. Now, I want to preface this by saying that Dragon can be ANYTHING but shy, but he is always a gentleman, and will consistently defer to the ladies in these lifestyle scenarios. The unwritten rule is that the lady takes the lead.
When I'm alone, sitting here with a glass of wine, I can feel my assertive side take a grip from deep within, and I can "grow a set" for lack of a better phrase. But when a situation is realized, I am suddenly, like a turtle, thrust back into my shell wanting desperately for someone else to take over - male or female. I'm not quite sure how to break out of that shell without seeming like a terrible geek.
I SO wanted to be much more aggressive with both Josh and Julianne. For the evening's purposes, dining and drinking, I would have probably been more aggressive with Josh, had I gotten the nerve. Some touches. Some flirtatious remarks. That was inside of me, but the "ballsy" Lola chose, instead, to be shy. If I could, I would kick my own ass for that.
This shyness progressed throughout the evening. The quandry, we found, is when all four participants suffer from the same disorder. The evening progressed slowly, but we all were having fun in the meantime.
Once in the hotel room, I remained shy (not quite the right balance of liquor to soften my inhibitions, I think), and when we all got on the bed together, my shyness turned into a horrible complex about my body.
I've talked about my body within the screens of this blog a time or two. Childbirth and nursing have taken their toll on what are strong abs underneath scarring, and perky breasts lowered to a sag when positioned incorrectly. The entire night I was completely overtaken by my feelings of inadequateness in this area. Dragon continually stresses to me that this is foolishness on my part, and that there is nothing more sexy than a confident woman.
That's all well and good when I'm feeling sexy and confident, but when fingers roam my breasts, my stomach, my pussy for the first time, I'm left with that clenching fear of those touching those soft parts being put off. How do I overcome this mental battle within myself?
That aside, for moments I was able to be given over to the pleasure of her mouth, his mouth - three mouths licking my wet pussy. Three mouths sucking on my breasts. There's nothing more pleasurable, and in that I was able to receive and enjoy. I am grateful for that.
Julianne was exquisite, in form and in technique. She was determined to make me - last of the foursome - to reach orgasm. Thank you for that, dear lady. You are gifted.
Josh was beautiful as well, in form and technique. He gave my pussy such pleasure, and his cock was....well....an oral fantasy. I was able to make him come, and I was able to swallow the release that welled up inside of him - a first in our playtimes. It was delightful.
My take on the whole experience was that I need to find my "groove," that is the balance between aggressiveness, flirtatiousness, and sexuality. I need to find the sweet spot. It is something that I HIGHLY look forward to.
I have also recognized the benefit of playing with partners multiple times. Take my girl crush for example (she still is and I MISS her!!!!). The first time I experienced her, I was my same shy self, worrying about my body (even though I told her in advance of my shortcomings and fears). And she told me to stop worrying about it. I did, and had a wonderful time, The second time we played, however, my body image issues were not there. I didn't give it a second thought, because I knew that she knew my body already, so I had nothing to fear.
This, I think, will be key for me. I will be able to relax SO much more when engaging with people we've already known and played with. So come on! I'm ready for seconds!!!! :-)
Thank you Josh and Julianne. You were wonderful. You were sexy. I do so welcome more.
I want to give a brief post about our enjoyable evening with Josh and Julianne, but it won't be as in depth or detailed as I would prefer. So have patience, and know that more will follow.
Josh and Julianne were everything we expected them to be and more. We knew we would enjoy their company, and knew, somewhat, from pictures we had seen that they were both gorgeous. And they were! Julianne had that long gorgeous red hair that I covet, and Josh was too cute, handsome, and adorable for words.
The only part of the evening that I want to delve into at this point is the awkwardness that seeps into an evening with a playful couple when both couples can be a bit shy. Now, I want to preface this by saying that Dragon can be ANYTHING but shy, but he is always a gentleman, and will consistently defer to the ladies in these lifestyle scenarios. The unwritten rule is that the lady takes the lead.
When I'm alone, sitting here with a glass of wine, I can feel my assertive side take a grip from deep within, and I can "grow a set" for lack of a better phrase. But when a situation is realized, I am suddenly, like a turtle, thrust back into my shell wanting desperately for someone else to take over - male or female. I'm not quite sure how to break out of that shell without seeming like a terrible geek.
I SO wanted to be much more aggressive with both Josh and Julianne. For the evening's purposes, dining and drinking, I would have probably been more aggressive with Josh, had I gotten the nerve. Some touches. Some flirtatious remarks. That was inside of me, but the "ballsy" Lola chose, instead, to be shy. If I could, I would kick my own ass for that.
This shyness progressed throughout the evening. The quandry, we found, is when all four participants suffer from the same disorder. The evening progressed slowly, but we all were having fun in the meantime.
Once in the hotel room, I remained shy (not quite the right balance of liquor to soften my inhibitions, I think), and when we all got on the bed together, my shyness turned into a horrible complex about my body.
I've talked about my body within the screens of this blog a time or two. Childbirth and nursing have taken their toll on what are strong abs underneath scarring, and perky breasts lowered to a sag when positioned incorrectly. The entire night I was completely overtaken by my feelings of inadequateness in this area. Dragon continually stresses to me that this is foolishness on my part, and that there is nothing more sexy than a confident woman.
That's all well and good when I'm feeling sexy and confident, but when fingers roam my breasts, my stomach, my pussy for the first time, I'm left with that clenching fear of those touching those soft parts being put off. How do I overcome this mental battle within myself?
That aside, for moments I was able to be given over to the pleasure of her mouth, his mouth - three mouths licking my wet pussy. Three mouths sucking on my breasts. There's nothing more pleasurable, and in that I was able to receive and enjoy. I am grateful for that.
Julianne was exquisite, in form and in technique. She was determined to make me - last of the foursome - to reach orgasm. Thank you for that, dear lady. You are gifted.
Josh was beautiful as well, in form and technique. He gave my pussy such pleasure, and his cock was....well....an oral fantasy. I was able to make him come, and I was able to swallow the release that welled up inside of him - a first in our playtimes. It was delightful.
My take on the whole experience was that I need to find my "groove," that is the balance between aggressiveness, flirtatiousness, and sexuality. I need to find the sweet spot. It is something that I HIGHLY look forward to.
I have also recognized the benefit of playing with partners multiple times. Take my girl crush for example (she still is and I MISS her!!!!). The first time I experienced her, I was my same shy self, worrying about my body (even though I told her in advance of my shortcomings and fears). And she told me to stop worrying about it. I did, and had a wonderful time, The second time we played, however, my body image issues were not there. I didn't give it a second thought, because I knew that she knew my body already, so I had nothing to fear.
This, I think, will be key for me. I will be able to relax SO much more when engaging with people we've already known and played with. So come on! I'm ready for seconds!!!! :-)
Thank you Josh and Julianne. You were wonderful. You were sexy. I do so welcome more.
2 Comments:
That's the key...there's a fine line between keeping things new and exciting and being "too" familiar. We're in this because we like the new and exciting! We like the added craziness that is meeting, hanging out and fucking new friends. What we have to do next is figure out how to not make them into old friends...that fit comfortably but no longer give us that excitement!!
It is all about balance, dear Lola. Balancing the quiet side and the side that is dying to find a lover and rip their clothes and having your way with them. MMmm...balance. ;)
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